Today you will discover a tool that will help you to remove the procrastination habit out of your life and start moving forward in the achievement of exactly what you need to accomplish in your life now 1. Uncover your Undesired State 2. Create your Desired State 3. Swish the undesired state away 4. And replace it with the new desired state Now it is encouraged to repeat this process at least 7 10 times to help change your neurology to the new desired state. http://www.markholland.com.au …

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I believe I have one of the other or both.

As for the anxiety when I am with friends, I tend to take jokes literally. Even though I know they are joking my facial expressions show or nonverbals show otherwise. When I am with groups I tend to feel a little anxious, but when I am with 1 or 2 people I tend to talk a lot and socialize accordingly. I sometimes ask too many questions my friends say and I get tempered easily. I forget about it pretty quickly though. I also tend to fidget a lot when I talk; I am kinda a spaz. Hopefully this is not asperger's syndrome. I also have trouble standing up for myself because I know I shouldn't be mad. If I do stand up for myself, people have trouble taking me seriously.

As for add, I get my schoolwork finished. I have a 3.7 in college as a Sophomore. However, I tend to have selective focusing. I can't focus on several things at once. I also tend to procrastinate and get distracted easily. I also sometimes tend to go off subject or go one-sided in the conversation. I sometimes interrupt, but I usually catch myself on these problems and apologize and let the other person keep talking.

An example of my add/anxiety is when I use to play school basketball; I always seemed out of it when the coach told us a play, and I just fidget around when standing. I had a hard time picking up on basketball plays told to me verbally. I learned better and faster by visualizing the plays on paper.

Sorry for the scattered information; I just put all the symptoms I am aware of. I'd appreciate the help. With these symptoms I feel like an outsider.

Social/Communication Traits of Aspergers

* Despite a desire for friends, difficulty in initiating or maintaining close relationships
* Problems reading non-verbal or social cues or understanding/using social rules
* Very socially naïve and as a result are often taken advantage of, rejected, or bullied
* Social contact may be directed by them (e.g. play is "on their terms" or not at all)
* Poor (or intense) eye contact, atypical use of gestures and flat or inappropriate facial expressions
* One-sided conversations, and little ability for "small talk"
* May appear overly shy or overly extroverted, but inappropriately so
* Unaware of others' thoughts, feelings or perceptions resulting in inadvertently appearing rude or inconsiderate
* Literal interpretation of communication from others
* Avoidant of social contact or events, and may experience heightened anxiety in social situations
* Language is learned and used in "chunks" (e.g., phrases, dialogue from TV shows, etc.)
* Communication is used for delivering information or requesting, not as a way of interacting socially

________________________________

Behavioural Traits

* May respond poorly to changes, sensory stimuli, transitions, lack of structure, and restrictions
* Repetitive movements (e.g., jumping, rocking, pacing) and speech (i.e., talking about favourite topics, interest)
* Rigid, inflexible and rule-bound behaviour
* Inappropriate behaviour given the social situation (e.g., speaking too loud in place of worship)
* Exaggerated emotional response to situations (e.g., tantrums when asked to something that they don’t want to do)
* Superior ability to focus on favourite activity or area of interest (e.g., spends hours mastering video game to the exclusion of other pastimes)

Cognitive Traits

* Average to superior intelligence
* Detail oriented approach to tasks which may result in missing the “bigger picture”
* May have associated learning disabilities (e.g., non-verbal learning disability)
* Often have high verbal scores in a cognitive assessment, and low performance scores
* Difficulty seeing “parts-to-whole” and “whole-to-parts” relationships
* Prefer technical/factual information over abstract

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Although I am aware I have sourced the above for your attention. I would like to add that it can be all too easy to attempt to fit individuals under certain labels, and indeed into various little compartments for the convenience of neuro-typical-normalcies order. While some of these traits may ring true for myself (and perhaps you) I would remember that life is far more diverse than Psychologists are able to identify or indeed willing to identify. And thus it may be assumed that we are each individuals with both flaws and positives which makes us each who we are.

I am very much an outsider, though as I grow older I learn to appreciate the unique perspective that being such allows me.

All the best to you.

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I grew up with a father who, as a professional football coach, was never around, and when he was around was constantly pushing me to be good at sports to justify his position as a coach, and as a measure of him being a good father. On top of that, he never wanted to do anything I or my brother or mom wanted to do unless he wanted to, as well. And he never gave me advice for anything…

Needless to say, I’ve grown up without a father figure. This lead to me having primarily female friends growing up, and now I face the problem of trying to make male-male relationships work, especially being in the military now. I’m not gay, nor bisexual, but I have a very hard time making male friends. The competitiveness, one-upping each other all the time, etc. is really awkward and uncomfortable to me. Add on top of this my search for a girlfriend who doesn’t see me as just a friend with no sexual attractiveness (I’ve gotten that way too many times.)

Is this normal? Is there any way to over come this anxiety even at my age (22)?

Thanks

Well, one way to overcome the anxiety would be to stop the pity party and stop placing blame here, there and everywhere. This is your life, man. You need to take action, and you need to take control. Yeah, you aren’t competitive. So what? A lot of guys aren’t! Part of life is fighting for what you want. Being a male is a constant struggle for self-identity. You want a girl, you gotta fight for her by showing her your interest.

Sometimes the truth hurts, but trust me, I’m trying to help you. Not bring you down.

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